We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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