There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
