Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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