my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
