What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Green mimosas i think yes
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
