Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
