i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
