how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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