I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
