She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
