Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
