is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
