matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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