I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize