I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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