If i come over, it means nothing
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
it glows. i had to have it.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
