Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
