Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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