I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize