I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
