your room smells of hookers.
And success
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
4 words: hood of his car
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
