Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
You were trust falling into bushes
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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