The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Randomize