His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
