i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
Randomize