We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
