no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
