is wine microwaveable?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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