Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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