Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I FOUND THE LEGS
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Randomize
