just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
