I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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