Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
