Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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