you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
