Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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