My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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