no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
