just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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