guys are only as good as the porn they watch
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
