I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
