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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar

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• (650): View more from California

  This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"

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• (812): View more from Indiana

  After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right

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• (561): View more from Florida

  Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.

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• (315): View more from New York

  I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex

  Fav 1 670 300

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better

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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?

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