i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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