How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
