My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
