i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
