Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Randomize
