so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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