But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
