If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
